Some say being a Mom is a full time job, combined with multiple responsibilities across a spectrum of departments. In fact, one research study suggest that full time Moms are worth $138,000.00 a year. I completely agree and, thanks to Lovable Labels BlogHer ’11 Contest, I’d like to show you what one job responsibilities come with the Mom Job Position.
Do you have the ability to fold laundry, help kids with homework, cook dinner, and blog about it when they go to bed? Do you have a knack for carpooling and sweet talking PTA members? Are you naturally inclined to attend playdates and develop meaningful relationships with other Moms all for a common goal of gaining sanity for an hour?
MommaFindings LLC, a motherhood development company, is looking for a talented individual, education-minded leader to use innovative life skills and playground strategies to raise three children all under the age of nine to move into a future of collegiate and adult maturity.
We are looking for a leader who is capable of inspiring and influencing a 4-yr-old that throwing a monster fit in the middle of the grocery aisle will, not only scar his future goals of Lucky Charms in the morning, but will also lead to a very hard nose-in-the-corner lesson to be learned later in life. The ideal candidate will be a dynamic, “Can Do!” team player who has proven to maintain excellent relationships within the community school, baseball fields, and the Wal-Mart Staff. Hands on work will be required along with specific responsibilities that include:
- whine alert awareness within the home
- creative disciplinary tactics
- coordinate execution of homework and chores
- manage social media for the family including vacation pictures and updates to grandparents.
- work with retail store managers on aisle clean up after vomitting and/or bodily function accidents
- the ability to be alert and awake at any time due to illness, accidents, whining children, or late night snuggles
- possess a loving characteristic that can talk a pre-tween down after a bad day of school, discuss why certain cowgirl outfits are not allowed in 1st grade, and explain why a 4-yr-old should not spend more than 8 hours on the computer
- run without losing breath while chasing the family dog
- quick emergency assessment during witching hour (hour where kids are grumpy, dog is barking, phone is ringing, and dinner is cooking).
Momma Findings LLC is a brand that has been in the Mom business for almost nine years. We strive at coffee drinking, occasional moments to ourselves, and keeping what little sanity we have left at the end of the day.
As many Peanut Butter and Jelly kisses as you want.
Work hours are 5am-6pm with a 3.2 minute break to go to the bathroom. Job will commence through midnight when your eyes can no longer stay open, just in time for your husband to ask for sex.
**My husband not included**
All applicants must send their resume along with a letter of recommendation to myself, where I’ll, in turn, hire a potential candidate.
Latest posts by Sara Patterson (see all)
- Music Monday: Just Breathe - June 20, 2016
- There is a wolf prowling our schools - May 25, 2016
- Music Monday: I completely adore the song “Priceless” - May 23, 2016